Son Preference and Discrimination Against Girls in India: A Personal Account

A late-night request for help

In the first week of December, at about 3:40 a.m., my mobile phone rang. I did not answer, but the phone rang again around twenty minutes later. It was the young man who cleaned my car. He asked for money because his pregnant wife was expected to deliver that morning. Although he had already received a substantial salary advance and attended work irregularly, I told him to come and collect some money.

A mother without access to hospital care

He arrived roughly half an hour later and said that he had not slept because his wife had been crying in pain all night. I asked why she was not in hospital. He replied that the delivery would take place at home because he could not afford hospital admission, and that he needed the money for medicine. I was deeply disturbed that his wife was suffering without adequate medical care. I gave him the money.

Celebrating a son while neglecting health

The following day, his brother, who also worked in my office, told me that a baby boy had been born and the family was happy. I was relieved that the mother and child had survived. But a day later, the father called again. This time he wanted me to help him obtain 25 to 30 bottles of liquor at a discount for a party celebrating the birth of his son. I was shocked: he had been unable or unwilling to arrange hospital care for his wife, yet was prepared to spend on a celebration. The family already had two daughters. His attitude made me worry that he valued a son more highly than his daughters.

The disagreement and its aftermath

I urged him to abandon the party and use his resources to care for his wife and children. He insisted that the celebration was important to friends and relatives and said he would find help elsewhere. I then asked him to repay the money he had borrowed before spending on a party. Two days later he repaid the loan, appeared angry and stopped cleaning my car. His brother later told me that the party had indeed taken place and was funded through another loan. The family was living in a settlement without even a household toilet.

Why equal treatment matters

The incident left me troubled by discrimination against girls. In my home community, I had not encountered the same open preference for sons, and I believe girls and boys deserve equal care and opportunity. I also oppose dowry; I paid the expenses of my own marriage rather than demand money from my wife's family. Yet in some communities, even educated families celebrate a boy's birth lavishly while treating the birth of a girl as disappointing news. That attitude must change.

A call to confront discrimination

A society cannot claim progress while tolerating discrimination against daughters, neglect of maternal health, dowry demands and child labour. Public debate and political arguments attract attention, but everyday inequalities inside families deserve at least as much concern. Every child, irrespective of sex, deserves dignity, safety, education and love.

Legal protections for women and girls in India

India's constitutional and statutory framework recognises equality and addresses specific forms of discrimination. Relevant provisions include:

• Constitution, Article 14: equality before the law and equal protection of the laws; Article 15(1): prohibition of discrimination by the State on grounds including sex; Article 15(3): permits special provisions for women and children; and Article 21: protection of life and personal liberty.
• Pre-Conception and Pre-Natal Diagnostic Techniques (Prohibition of Sex Selection) Act, 1994: prohibits sex selection and regulates prenatal diagnostic techniques. See the India Code legislative database.
• Dowry Prohibition Act, 1961, sections 3 and 4: provide penalties for giving, taking and demanding dowry, subject to the statutory terms and exceptions.
• Prohibition of Child Marriage Act, 2006, section 3: provides that child marriages are voidable at the option of the contracting party who was a child, subject to the Act's conditions; certain marriages are void under sections 12 and 14.
• Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act, 2005: provides civil protection and other remedies for women facing domestic violence.

Official legal texts and amendments can be checked through India Code and the Legislative Department.

Maternal healthcare and practical support

Families should seek timely skilled medical assistance during pregnancy and childbirth. Public health facilities can provide information about available maternal and newborn services, including schemes such as Janani Suraksha Yojana and Janani Shishu Suraksha Karyakram under the National Health Mission, subject to eligibility and local implementation. In an immediate emergency in India, call 112.

What families and communities can do

• Prioritise safe delivery, postpartum care, nutrition and vaccination over ceremonial expenditure.
• Celebrate the birth of daughters and sons equally and support equal access to education and healthcare.
• Reject dowry demands and discriminatory family practices.
• Encourage respectful discussion about harmful stereotypes rather than assuming every family behaves alike.

Conclusion

The central question in this account remains relevant: why should the birth of a son justify spending while a mother's healthcare or a daughter's needs are treated as secondary? Equal respect is demonstrated through daily choices, not simply public statements about equality.